A Family that once was, is no more
by Tenshinhan
Summary: Pan is now a young mother and on her own in life. Her family disowns when they discover her pregnancy and that Trunks is the suspected father. Things turn from bad to worse when Trunks disappears. Takes place five years after.
1. The life and people ive come to know

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the following Dragonball character's written in the fan fiction,nor the production of any merchandise of Dragonball.

Title: "Family that once was ,is no more."

Chapter One: The life and people I've come to know.

Part one: Along the streets of Satan city she walked what for what seemed like hours. Transportation was available, only the money wasn't.

People passed her by, pushing and shoving her this way and that. She was compelled to push back, but kept her focus on getting home to her child, before it got to late. She thought about her daughter, she was someone who wanted to spend every waking moment with her .But Pan had to work so that her child, if not her, could at least be well fed and clothed.

She also thought back to the days where situations like these wouldn't be a problem, or more well put , were never a problem. But she gave all that up. Pan gave all that up for her child's image but more importantly her future.

Pan fought so very hard those first four months of her child's life, fighting so that her child wouldn't be taken away from her. And would never be branded as a unwanted child who came about as accidental. Those thoughts were with her every single day, and she was mistaken when she thought she had placed them in the back of her mind...with her family.

She pulled out her keys as she approached her home, but her fingers were so cold she dropped the keys in the snow. Tired and weak she knelt slowly to the snow and searched around trying to get a feel of the cold metal keys.

Finally her hand ran across the cold metal which on touch made her shutter. Pan recovered them from the floor, gripping them this time with both hands to prevent losing them again. She walked up the to the large metal door with dark tinted glass and slowly gripped the handle.

She placed her keys in the pocket of her light brown coat which stopped at her knees. And began to rub her hands together quickly to get rid of the numbness cause by the cold air. Gripping the door handle once more she placed the key in the lock and turned it clockwise. Suddenly a small beep sounded letting it be known the door had been opened.

Pan entered the dark apartment complex and slowly turned back to the door to join it with it's frame. She felt someone behind her. Fearing the person might have intentions other than exiting the apartment, she quickly unlocked the door once more to act as if she was leaving.

"You really don't stop do you?, you just got in and your going out again?" Asked the figure behind her. She sighed a very relaxed sigh as she recognized the person's voice.

"One of these days your going to give this old woman a heart attack." Pan said smiling at the person.

"Old? Jeez if your an old woman, my wife must be ancient." Said the man.

Pan smiled a bit. "This is the first time I've seen you on a Friday , what are you changing hours around on me?" Pan joked.

"I asked the company for an extra shift, Monday to Thursday isn't paying the bills that well anymore." The security guard sighed.

"I hear you, I just finished my overtime, any more hours on the clock and I'd barely have time to see my little one at all. " Pan said remembering her own problems.

"Well what are you going to do, you know? It's better to barely get by then not at all ." Pan stated starting to head towards the elevator .

"Get some rest Pan, tell the little person smile for me next time." The security guard said as she boarded the elevator.

"I'll tell her, goodnight Eric." Pan said just as the doors closed.

Eric's smile faded as Pan moved out of sight.

"So young having to carry such a huge responsibility, it doesn't seem fair." Eric said exiting through the maintenance room to finish making his rounds.

The elevator stopped and reached the tenth floor. The young mother ever so slowly made her way to her apartment. She had put on her best smile in front of the security guard just to keep him from worrying, which is common for just about everybody she meets. She was hurting so much inside and out.

Pan thoughts drove her wild at times. To her, her situation was never going to change. Her options were limited, some not even considerable. Though she had one very little in size, but large incentive to keep faith and herself alive .She finally reached her door.

"10h.." She uttered as she knocked three times.

She braced herself for was what about to take place. The knob turned quickly and that was the last thing she saw.

"MOMMY!" Screamed a young lavender haired girl as she leapt on to Pan knocking her to a kneeling position.

"I'm glad to see you too baby ,but mommy can't hug you when you pressed against mommy's chest like that." Pan said weakly smiling.

"Sorry..." The girl said a little sadden as Pan got up.

"Ah don't worry baby I'm not hurt...much... I forgot how strong you are, but I don't know how much more this mommy can take." Pan said giving a quick smile.

"Come on lets go inside and you tell me about your day with auntie Erasa ok?" Pan said taking her daughter by the hand.

"Ok...mama?" The girl asked in a low tone. Pan stop and looked back.

"Yeah Nikita?" Pan asked.

"I thought--" Nikita started.

"What? what's wrong?." Pan said with a note of concern in her voice.

"I thought about what you told me, last night, about one day I when I wouldn't see you again"

"Nikita I--"

"About not coming back--I thought this time you weren't!" The young girl said flying into her mother nuzzling against her and squeezing her tight.

Pan began to shed tears as she heard her daughter's sweet voice utter those words and began to speak.

"I just had to work a little later than I normally do. I'm sorry I worried you, and Mommy isn't going anywhere to she can't come back from, not while I still have you...ok sweetie? Forget about what Mommy said mommy was being stupid ." Pan said picking up her daughter and kissing her on the cheek. She then carried her inside.

"Hey Erasa I'm back..." Pan called out searching the living room for her roommate as she put her daughter down.

"She's in the shower mommy." Nikita said making her way on to the floor in front of the television.

"Oh really... and what have you been doing all day my little angel?" Pan stated pulling off heavy garments of clothing she had worn all day due to the cold snowy weather.

"I was drawing you a picture mommy!" Nikita said leaping off the floor to the table and picked up a colorful drawing.

"See mama?" The girl held the drawing proudly.

"I see baby but uh... what is it?" Pan said a little confused starring at the jumbled drawing.

"See over here is you, me and auntie Erasa." The young girl stated excitedly.

"Oh yeah now I see it, but Nikita, who's the person standing next to you?" Pan asked knowing their where only two people Nikita including in her drawing's other than her self. Her and her roommate Erasa.

"That's my new friend mommy." The girl stated happily.

Pan kneeled down and stared at her daughter with concern.

"Nikita what new friend? and does auntie Erasa know about this? why don't people tell me these things?" Pan asked obviously worried that someone had been associating with her daughter without her consent.

"I don't know his name mommy but he's always in my dreams and he's really nice too. He take's me flying with him and everything. I already told auntie." The girl stated mimicking an airplane.

Pan sighed.

"Oh thank god Nikita I thought it was an actual person, but if its only in your dreams than I guess there's no harm in that. Well now my little airplane your scheduled for a landing at B.E.D interroom airport so off you go." Pan stated signaling to her daughter who was now circling the room as an airplane.

"Whoa...easy there you little 747 you might hit something." A young blonde woman stated passing by Nikita patting her on the head.

"Hey Pan, you kind a had me worried there for a minute, I thought something had happened on your way home." The young woman said taking a seat next to pan.

"Oh...Erasa I'm sorry it's just taking a little longer to get home now a days and overtime isn't making it any better either .I just don't have the energy to move any quicker I guess. All I want to do now is take a nice hot shower then put Niki to bed." Pan said resting her head on the wooden table.

"You go on Pan I'll get her to bed." Erasa said getting up.

"Oh I really don't know what I'd do without you Erasa." Pan said leaning over embracing her friend.

"Come on Pan you know how I care for you and the twin engine over there." She said pointing out to Nikita who began too slow down a bit on her rotations.

"Hey Niki time for bed." Erasa called out to Nikita while walking in the bedroom.

"Coming...mommy are your going to watch cartoons with me tomorrow?" Nikita asked hopefully.

Pan smiled a little bit. "Maybe, I'm not promising anything because it's kind of early, but maybe okay?" Pan said kissing Nikita on the forehead.

"Now off to bed." Pan ordered.

Nikita dashed off to bed.

"Now let's see if I can do a little self healing." The exhausted mother said heading for the shower.

Pan shredded the remaining garments from her body. She stood in front of a long mirror noticing herself and how different she appears from what she actually remembers her self as.

She smiled "It's weird I have no idea where all this came from, I use to be such a tiny little thing its hard to believe." She said then turning and stepping into the shower.

The warm water made her tense muscle's relax. She stared at the water escaping the shower head. Soon her thoughts began to drift to places other than the shower.

"Grandpa..." She thought almost out loud.

"He would have understood...he would have made them all understand. But I guess I was meant to be without family in the long run of life." Pan spoke leaning against the glass door of the shower.

"Five years ago... it seems so much longer now, it'll be six in two months..." Glancing over at the at wall clock She soon realize how long she'd been in the shower and quickly turned off the water and dried herself. She exited the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her. The air outside of the bathroom was cold so she quickly dashed to her room.

Once there she slipped into some warm clothes then quietly made her way to Erasa's room to check on her daughter. She found Erasa exiting her room being as quiet as possible.

"She's out cold...but I'm not taking any chances." Erasa stated.

"Erasa, can we talk a minute in the living room?" Pan signaled to the left .

"Okay..." She said as they both left the hall way quietly. Erasa took a seat on the couch with Pan sitting opposite of it.

"Erasa, what I wanted to talk to you about is Nikita." Pan started.

"Oh did Nikita go into my stuff again? I swear Pan I didn't want her to see-- ." Erasa said apologizing.

"Wait--no it's not that… has Nikita talked to you about a man in her dreams?" Pan asked.

"Whoa Pan, don't you think Nikita's a bit young to be thinking about boys?" Erasa pointed out.

"No not like that you goof, I mean in general just someone in her dreams?" Pan explained.

"Well she was telling me about the guy she drew in the picture and that he's a nice person, etc. But I figured since Nikita didn't have any real friends she probably made this one up. I wouldn't blame her." She said staring at the ceiling.

."Oh... Erasa maybe she did make up this imaginary friend...but is it because I don't spend enough time with her?" Pan asked her friend and by the expression posted on her face she was taking this seriously.

Erasa knew how Pan felt, well in a way. She knew the only time Pan spent with her daughter was in the morning before she left for work and a little over an hour and a half when she got home in the evening. Even if on Saturdays when she didn't work Pan was too tired from the day before to even get up from bed.

"Pan...I don't know what to tell you, I mean Nikita's healthy thank god ,but the truth is you can't afford to spend more time than you already have with her .I mean I go to work and leave Nikita with Mrs. Avalon and I look at her eye's and see how unhappy she is but--" Erasa was about to finish until Pan spoke.

"But unless we want to keep her healthy and keep a roof over our heads it has to be this way right?" Pan said softly. Erasa nodded.

"Erasa I'm just worried that when Niki's grown she'll hate me for it. This is not the mother I wanted to be." The raven haired mother said almost shedding tears.

"Hey hold on Pan, where did you get it in your head that Niki's not realizing the position were in? she knows if we don't work we'll have no home or food." Erasa said moving over to her friend's side.

"I know she knows the reason why but it just the way all kids are they need more than just a home and to be healthy to make them happy. They need friends their own age to be with and if not that just to spend quality time with someone." Pan said staring into her friend's eye's.

"So what do you think we should do Pan? you know the only way you can do what's best for Nikita is to have your family involved or eventually find someone who'll love and support you and Nikita." Erasa said stating the truth.

"Erasa I made a promise to myself that I would never look back and I'm keeping it. And as for finding someone, I'm just to afraid he'll leave me like Nikita's father did." Pan said in doubt.

"Pan if you keep thinking like that I'm sure you'll wont find anyone and eventually drive yourself to the point where you wont recover." Erasa expressed.

"I don't know how you can stand knowing you have a family and not wanting any part of them." Erasa said expressing her own opinions.

"It's easy when that family wants no part of you." Pan stated.

Erasa was silent.

"I never wanted this life you know... everything I held vanished in mere days I'm the only family she'll ever know because I'm the only person who gives a fuck." Pan assured her.

"But if something does take an awful twist, I would like Nikita too at least remember me as a mom who tried to make her happy at least once." Pan stated.

"What are you suggesting?" Erasa asked.

"Tomorrow it us and Nikita...I was thinking we'd go too the park so Niki could get to know some other kids in the area ,and have fun in the snow. I would like her to experience for the first time what it feels like to just let go and be a kid, happy and carefree." Pan said smiling.

"Alright but how do you feel physically Pan? It isn't wise to push your self to hard." Erasa said concerned for her friend's health.

"I'm a little sore but I think the bath helped somewhat, and with a goodnights rest we just might be able to pull it off tomorrow." Pan said content resting her head on Erasa lap.

"Yeah...just maybe." Pan said as her eyes began to close.

"Come on Pan let's get you to bed." Erasa stated helping her sleepy friend off the couch and off to bed.

"Niki's sleeping with you tonight?" Pan asked walking down the hall next to Erasa.

"Yeah this way you'll be able to sleep more comfortable tonight and you wont have to worry about the Pele accidentally kicking you again." Erasa said opening the door to Pan's room.

"Thanks." Pan said leaning her head on Erasa shoulder.

"You know I love you Pan, your my family now and I have got to look out for you." Erasa said kissing pan on the cheek.

Pan laid down as Erasa draped the blanket over her.

"Thanks..." Pan muttered as her eyes began to close.

"I couldn't imagine losing the only family I have really known." Erasa said at the door, then turned the lights out and disappeared down the hall.

"Family...that's what I want." Pan said drifting off too sleep.


	2. The reawakening of the undeniable truth

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the following Dragonballz character's written in the fan fiction,nor the production of any Dragonball z merchandise.   
  
  
Title: "Family that once was is no more"  
Chapter Two: The reawakening of the undeniable truth.   
  
  
Part Two: like many early mornings Pan sat in her bed and struggled to try and remember life before that day.That day had been the only moment in her life still vivid and clear as the sun.That day had been a day of over whelming joy and excitement,but it was those emotions that led to such a distasteful end for a young girl who wanted nothing more to be treated as an adult.   
  
Pan remembered how happy she was and how happy he was.But she often wonders if the joy written on his face was as fake as the smile she wears today.   
  
He gave her the night she had always wanted and even more so since it was with the man she had always wanted.   
  
She felt so ashamed of herself and what she'd lost and what she'd become to even think about going home or even showing her face in that part of Satan city again.   
  
"It was made so painfully clear that I would have to change in order to be part of that family." Pan thought tucking a few strands of her long black hair behind her ear, revealing a fairly large scar which she kept concealed.  
  
"Very painfully." Pan finished placing her hand over the wound.   
  
Pan wore that scar more mentally than physically since it was given by someone she'd thought would never ever harm her in anyway.   
  
"An Eye for an eye,huh dad?" Pan thought.   
  
Everyone present that evening vividly recalls the confrontation between Pan and her father but especially the terror written on Pan's face as blood trickled down her cheek and on to the collar of her shirt.   
  
The blow was intentional,as well as the terror.   
  
Pan remembers how many days she was confined to her room unable to leave after that.Unable to go to school until she had the baby.Unable to watch Television, she ate and drank in that room.She wasn't allowed to join her family at the dinner table or talk to her friends.What little friends she had left anyway.   
  
Gohan and Videl had been dealt a serious blow to the trust they had in Pan completely shattering it.They had seen what had happened because they gave Pan too many chances and fewer rules.   
  
Goten and Paris mostly kept quiet but were the only ones who once in a while accompanied Pan, talked with her a bit often trying to put a smile on her face and were often successful.   
  
"Your pretty when you think." Erasa said brushing a few strands of hair away from Pan's face sitting at the side of Pan's bed next to her.   
  
Pan jumped in alarm.Having been so deep in memories she had failed to hear Erasa come in.   
  
"God Erasa don't do that!" Pan said momentarily frightened.   
  
"Sorry Pan I just didn't want to knock in case you where sleeping." Erasa explained.   
  
"How long have you been there?" Pan questioned wanting to know if Erasa heard anything.   
  
"Don't worry I just came in, what ever you did or said I didn't catch it." Erasa assured her.   
  
"You know me all too well, anyway what brings you into my insane asylum?" Pan asked lying flat on her bed now.   
  
"Well I brought your medication so they don't put you in a real one." Erasa said holding up a small bottle with some pills in it.   
  
"Not this again....." Pan said rolling her eyes.   
  
"Pan the doctor said----" Erasa began.   
  
"Yeah I know in order for me to get some mental stability back in my life , I have to drink it.Just give me the damn thing already." Pan said in disgust.   
  
"Good girl." Erasa said unscrewing the cap.   
  
"It'll help you get some sleep...." Erasa said giving Pan the pill and a glass of water.   
  
"No it'll sedate me and make my brain activity slower so I don't think as much." Pan reasoned.   
  
"Same thing..." Erasa joked as Pan drank the pill.   
  
"See there you go that didn't kill you did it?.." Erasa asked putting the medication away.   
  
"Give it time..." Pan said pulling the bed sheets over her body and resting her head on the pillow.   
  
"Just sleep Pan....." Erasa said kissing Pan on the forehead.   
  
"When's breakfast?." Pan said closing her eyes.   
  
"Niki's not up yet so I'll have breakfast done in an hour." Erasa said walking out of the room closing the door.   
  
"Ok...." Pan said as the sleep side affect of the medication set in.   
  
Scene One: Erasa stood by the stove finishing what was to be this morning's meal.  
  
"Finally I can eat and get out of the kitchen for the first time today." Erasa said placing the last pancake on to the stack.   
  
"Looks good Erasa." Pan stated picking up her fork as Erasa sat Pan's breakfast down in front of her and then Nikita's.   
  
"Mmmm....Syrup." Nikita stated globing down the pancakes.   
  
"Not this again." Erasa said disgusted that Nikita had almost finished and she had barely picked up her fork.   
  
"Nikita slow down.....God she eats like my Grandpa..." Pan said with a sigh.   
  
"Gra-n-dpa?" Nikita said chewing her last bite.   
  
"Baby don't talk with your mouth full I taught you better.We got plenty of time to get to the park." Pan reasoned.  
  
"Mommy who's Grandpa?" Nikita asked curiously.   
  
"My Grandpa Niki." Pan answered while eating her meal.   
  
Nikita was silent for am moment then spoke.   
  
"Mommy do I gots a Grandpa?" Nikita asked innocently.   
  
Pan didn't know what to tell her, she knew that at least one day when she was older she would understand.But how could anyone understand that their not wanted.  
  
"Nikita why don't you run along and get dress, I have to finish up my breakfast." Pan said changing the subject.   
  
"Alright, but mommy why--." Nikita started but was cut off.   
  
"Nikita please...." Pan ordered.  
  
Nikita did as she was told asking no further questions but curious as to why her mother would not answer her question.   
  
"Pan you alright?" Erasa asked picking up Nikita's plate.   
  
"Yeah I'm alright its just getting to that point you know." Pan said brushing her long raven black hair away from her face.   
  
"It'll be even worse when she asks you why she has a mommy and not a daddy." Erasa pointed out.   
  
"Dont remind me." Pan sighed.   
  
"Pan even though you might not think so along the line father and daughter are going to meet,either planned or by accident." Erasa said stating her own idea's.   
  
"That son of a bitch would probably deny it like he's done already.With both family's covering his ass." Pan stated.   
  
"How could anyone deny their relation to such a sweet child, she so innocent to everything and everyone around her." Erasa expressed.   
  
"He didn't think she was going be so sweet, he thought it was going to be this overwhelming burden placed on him and he left before she was born.The main reason I come to understand as to why he denies it is because of my age at that time." Pan explained.   
  
"Well it makes perfect sense ,the president of one of the largest corporations in the world wouldn't want to be labeled a--." Erasa started.   
  
"Dont say That word it makes me feel so cheap." Pan said holding her head.   
  
"You shouldn't feel that way Pan,its him who should feel cheap.Imagine a 26 year old sleeping with a 15 year old girl." Erasa said bit angered.   
  
"I figure he must have come to terms with my family so that this whole thing wouldn't leak out into the media or else Capsule Corp.Would of been a memory." Pan stated.   
  
"I guess so." Erasa said agreeing.  
  
"He never even saw his daughter so he probably doesn't even care enough to find out what happened to her." Pan explained.   
  
Nikita stood behind the wall hearing the conversation.Then quietly departed towards her room.   
  
"Pan I'm going ask you something and I want you to be completely honest." Erasa expressed.   
  
"You know I'm always very honest with you." Pan answered.  
  
"Do you still care for him?" Erasa asked.   
  
"Who?" Pan asked.   
  
"Trunks." Erasa stated   
  
"How can you even ask that?" Pan asked a bit annoyed.   
  
"Give me a straight answer yes or no." Erasa demanded.   
  
Pan thought for a minute wagering her feelings.   
  
"As completely retarded as this sounds.......yes I do." Pan admitted.   
  
Erasa knew the reason why Pan said yes.Trunks was her first lover and the only man ever to say to her I love you and appear as if he meant it,and maybe he really did.   
  
"Pan lets get dressed and get going it's going to be a fairly decent walk in about a foot of snow." Erasa said finishing her meal and discarding the plate.   
  
"Wait why did you ask me that? now I want you to be completely honest." Pan requested.  
  
"When we get back, the snow is really going to start piling up out there." Erasa said heading to her room.   
  
"Yeah later, ok." Pan said doing the same.  
  
[Minutes later in the lobby]  
  
"Pan look at you your going out with your coat unbuttoned." Erasa said fixing Pan's coat.   
  
"I know Mother." Pan joked.   
  
"I cant have my little girl going out there and catching a cold." Erasa said fixing the last button.   
  
"I told you Nikita you have to take good care of this ape mother of your's she's reckless." Erasa said which got a giggle out of Nikita.   
  
"Not a word shorty...." Pan said to Nikita taking her by the hand exiting the building.   
  
The snow neatly blanketed east Satan city where they lived.Making the scene very enjoyable.   
  
"The same scenery from when I was small." Pan said admiring the winter weather.   
  
"Remember going to the parade? when I was ten there was nothing like it, balloons of all they cartoon characters and super heros especially the great saiya-man he was my hero." Erasa said smiling.   
  
"Believe me Erasa a lot of these heros attitudes change over the years even the great saiya-man." Pan said remembering her personal knowledge of the Great Saiya-man.   
  
"I guess..." Erasa said as they reached the Park entrance.   
  
"Pan you can grab a seat at a table I'll set Niki up with a couple of the other kid's over there." Erasa said taking the little girl's hand.   
  
"Ok,now you have fun Niki and please stay out of trouble." Pan said kissing Nikita on the cheek.   
  
"Ok Mommy." Nikita said walking over to the playground with Erasa.   
  
Pan began to walk to the nearest table looking up at the beautiful green and red snow covered Christmas lights that hung from the tree.She approached the table and wipes off some of the collected snow and sat and waited for Erasa's return.   
  
"Hi everyone this is Nikita she was wondering if she could join with you." Erasa said to the group of kids.   
  
Nikita waved a bit shy.   
  
"Hi Nikita want to help me build an igloo?" A black haired little girl asked piling up some snow.   
  
"Ok." Nikita said happily joining the other little girl.   
  
"Well you seem to be content.....well if anything we'll be over there, ok?" Erasa explained.   
  
"Alright." Nikita said answered.   
  
Erasa walked back towards Pan and sat down.   
  
"So is she all set?" Pan asked.   
  
"She's good." Erasa answered.   
  
Both remained quiet for a few minutes admiring the winter wonderland atmosphere.   
  
"Pan I'm going to go get a coffee ,you want one?" Erasa asked.   
  
"Yeah I could use one." Pan answered.   
  
"Be back in a few,oh but first I'll grab a quick peek at what Niki's doing." Erasa said walking off.   
  
Erasa noticed a large figure in a long black leather coat kneeled down in the same spot Nikita and the other girl were playing in.She moved in closer to see and hear what the man was doing.   
  
"Now to make an igloo you've got to hollow out the inside or else it will be a pile of snow, no offense to what you two are doing I'm mean it's great and all but it's a pile of snow." The man said helping the girls.   
  
Erasa smiled at watching the man's sensitivity.Realizing his intentions were good she walked over to him.   
  
"Hello there." Erasa said getting the man's attention.   
  
"Hi." The man responded getting up.   
  
"So you giving the kids a few tips on igloo making?" Erasa asked.   
  
"Yeah they look like they could use a bit of help, but I'm no expert at it." He answered.   
  
"Are they your kids?" He asked.   
  
"The one with the lavender hair kind a is." Erasa explained wanting to make conversation.   
  
"I'm Erasa." Erasa said extending her hand.   
  
"Goten." He said shaking her hand.   
  
"Your daughter looks a lot like someone I know, only he's a guy." Goten told her.   
  
"Oh my, I don't know if she should take that as a compliment or an insult." Erasa joked.   
  
"Sorry what I meant too say was that she's very pretty and from hearing her speak she's very intelligent." Goten expressed.  
  
"You are a single parent?" Goten asked Erasa.   
  
"You could say that yeah." Erasa replied.   
  
"I hope I'm not being forward, but I was just going to get a cup of coffee, you want to join me?.I'm going get one for my friend too, I'll introduce her to you if you like?" Erasa asked.   
  
"Sure why not." Goten replied.   
  
"Ok sounds good." Erasa replied  
  
"Be back in a few." Erasa said patting Nikita on the head.   
  
"Later kids." Goten said leaving with Erasa.   
  
Goten and Erasa walked over to where the coffee vender stood and chatted the usual chat when a boy meets a girl and there is an attraction.Asking each other's ages,where they grew up and their likes and dislikes.Remarkably Pan did not come up in the conversation.   
  
They walked back over to were Pan was sitting until Goten's Cell phone rang and he took the call.   
  
"Erasa I'll be a few seconds you can go ahead of me." Goten instructed as Erasa approached the table.   
  
"Pan you wont believe what happen." Erasa spoke excitedly.   
  
"I'll believe it, but humor me." Pan said.   
  
"I met this wonderful guy who's really cute and funny." Erasa said happily.   
  
"Well where is he?" Pan asked looking around.   
  
"Right over there,I invited him over is that ok?" Erasa asked pointing to her left. Pan stared at the man Erasa pointed too she began to realize who it was.  
  
"Oh my God-- ." Were the only words Pan could muster as her mind focus on the.   
  
"He is cute right?" Erasa said unaware of what Pan was referring to when the word's 'oh my god' came out of her mouth.   
  
"Great he's done talking on his phone now you can meet him." Erasa said excited.   
  
"Oh god, no not here." Pan said nervously as she turned the opposite way.   
  
"Pan....you ok there? you feel like having your coffee now?." Erasa asked a little uneasy because she never saw Pan act that way before.   
  
Pan sat still but with her head turn opposite of his direction.   
  
"Hey Goten dude sit and lets chat." Erasa said as Goten stood next to Pan about to take a seat opposite of her.   
  
Goten stared at Pan who sat the opposite way.   
  
"If you think I'm stupid enough to think I'm not going know who you are by turning your god damn head your are very much mistaken Pan." Goten said firmly.   
  
"Don't give your self to much credit." Pan said as Goten grab her arm and lifted her up from her seat.   
  
"I'm not playing one of your stupid little games Pan!" Goten yelled.   
  
"Get your fucking hands off me!!" Pan yelled.   
  
"What the are you doing!?" Erasa yelled at Goten.   
  
"This doesn't concern you stay out of it!" Goten warned Erasa.   
  
"You don't even realize how much more you've complicated things with your little disappearing act." Goten explained.   
  
"Why don't you enlighten me then!?" Pan said struggling to break Goten's grip.   
  
"Pan what's happening?" Erasa asked terrified.   
  
"Your stopping this shit and your coming back so go get what ever belongings you have and---" Goten stopped as Pan broke free.   
  
"No Goten...." Pan said as she stepped back a couple of feet.   
  
"I'm not going back just to sit play the role of the bad guy." Pan argued.   
  
"Remeber when you were on my side Goten? protecting me from all the comments and things people threw at me? What happened to you? what happened?" Pan said as tears began to fall.   
  
"I got sick of your shit.Videl and Gohan shot the blame on me for the first 2 years saying that I encouraged the type of behavior that got you pregnant." Goten answered.   
  
"But you know that's not true!" Pan yelled.   
  
"I know that and you know that, but the other half of this fucking city doesn't know that!" Goten explained.   
  
  
"Erasa ....I can't see---I don't feel my--." Pan said as she clutched her chest.   
  
"Pan?" Erasa said as Pan stumbled a bit before dropping like a stone onto the thick snow.   
  
"Oh God no." Erasa said as she ran towards the fallen Pan.   
  
"What's wrong with her?" Goten said nervously as he kneeled at Pan's side and watched as Erasa lift Pan's head mildly tapping the left side of Pan's face to she if she would awake.   
  
Blood could be seen being absorb by the cold snow behind Pan's neck.  
  
"She hit the ground pretty hard." Erasa explained.  
  
"Why isn't she waking up?" Goten asked as his concern grew.   
  
"........She's not breathing." Erasa said as she tilted Pan's head back.   
  
Scene Two:  
  
"Pan come on sweety get up." A voice Pan heard as she was opening her eyes.   
  
"Huh?" Pan moaned as she turned to the direction in which Erasa was.   
  
"What am I doing home? wheres Nikita?" Pan asked as she sat up on her bed.   
  
"Easy Mommy Nikita's in my room taking a nap, you need to take it easy you hit your head fairly hard." Erasa said pointing to the ice pack next to Pan's pillow.   
  
"I remember a lot of shouting and stuff but then---Its all dark from that point." Pan explained.   
  
"You passed out for some reason." Erasa explained.   
  
"How did I get home?" Pan asked weakly.   
  
"Goten carried you to his car and took us back to the apartment since I know for you ambulances are out of the question." Erasa said putting a damp wash cloth on Pan's forehead.   
  
"What's that for?" Pan said asking about the cloth.   
  
"You probably can't feel it but you got a pretty bad fever brewing." Erasa informed her.   
  
"Is that why I'm so tried?" Pan asked closing her eyes.   
  
"Very likely." Erasa responded.   
  
"Where's Goten?" Pan asked.   
  
"He's in the living room he won't leave until he knows your ok." Erasa explained.   
  
"Want me to go get him?"   
  
"No I'll go he probably won't leave if he see's me still in bed." Pan said climbing out of her bed.   
  
"Hey Pan?" Erasa said getting Pan's attention.  
  
"Yeah?" She asked standing in the door way.  
  
"I had a chance to talk with him and I had a better idea about where he's coming from......hear him out ok? and let him getting some idea of what your going through." Erasa requested.  
  
"I'll try." Pan said exiting her room.  
  
Goten sat on the couch nervously tapping his foot awaiting any good sign that Pan was ok.   
  
"Tap any harder and you'll Put a hole in my floor." Pan said getting his attention.   
  
"Pan!" Goten said standing quickly.   
  
"Are you--" Goten started.   
  
"Alittle tried but I'm ok." Pan said sitting down next to Goten.   
  
"Sit." Pan instructed pulling Goten's shirt sleeve.   
  
"Pan I--I'm sor-I didn't mean--" Goten said trying to think of a proper apology.   
  
"Goten listen what happened to me today wasn't you fault." Pan admitted.   
  
"How so?..." Goten asked knowing how much the things he said and did at the park aggravated and frustrated Pan emotionally.   
  
"You see........I haven't been---I mean ever since--" Pan began while her eyes began to drip tears.   
  
"I'm ready to listen...." Goten said wiping the tears from her eyes.   
  
"Since I left home.... you know, I haven't been taking the best of care of myself because that wasn't my top priority anymore." Pan admitted.   
  
"Nikita was...." She finished.   
  
"But what happening to you now?" Goten questioned.  
  
"Now?" Pan said with a low chuckle.  
  
"Now I'm obligated to keep taking these fucking pills and shit to keep my ass from bouncing off the god damn walls." Pan said in a low disgusted tone.   
  
"I don't understand why would you have to take medication?" Goten questioned.   
  
"Because of everything that happened I fell into a deep depression and became for a short time emotionally unstable." Pan admitted.   
  
"I'm sorry that happened Pan and I guess the things I yelled at you today probably resurfaced old memories." Goten said.   
  
"I think about the past everyday Goten and wonder why me and Trunks couldn't of had a life together and if he didn't really love me why did he sleep with me." Pan spoke out loud asking herself.   
  
Goten remained quiet for a while.  
  
"What am I Goten? I'm not Pan anymore but what am I to you." Pan said staring into his eyes.   
  
"Your a little girl who grew up to fast." Goten said gentle running the back of his hand across Pan's cheek.   
  
Pan sat quiet for a minute then spoke.   
  
"Then where does this all grown up little girl go from here?" She questioned.   
  
"She goes back to being a little girl." Goten explained.   
  
"I don't understand...." She admitted.   
  
"You should come back Pan, give everyone a chance to see how much they wronged you and let them see the beautiful little girl who was at the center of all this mess the one who they said was better off dead." Goten explained.   
  
"I can't Goten I'm just to scared." Pan explained.   
  
"Fear was the problem then and fear is the problem now, everyone was so fearful of how everyone else would react they made everything worse." He explained.   
  
"I'm sorry I can't that's asking too much." Pan said getting up.   
  
"Pan there something else I can do for you." Goten explained.   
  
"Goten I really don't want to hear......." Pan began before she was cut off.  
  
"I can make your life a whole lot easier." He said.  
  
"I sat here and I looked at your daughter, your apartment and I get a small sense of your life and I sense that your barely getting by with little or no help." Goten expressed.   
  
"I'll admit that living in my current status is no amusement park but what are you getting at?" Pan questioned.  
  
"What I'm offering is that you and Nikita come live with me, I make more than enough to support the both of you so you could quit your job and spend time with Nikita as Erasa told me you really can't get around to doing on your hectic work days." Goten offered.   
  
"Listen Goten I don't live off of anyone without pulling my own weight and besides what about Erasa? me and Erasa are really close and I'm not going leave her to find other apartment because this one is too much money for her to keep on her paycheck alone." Pan explained.   
  
"If you feel like you need to pull your own weight Pan you could start school again and ask for Erasa she's welcome to come.I have enough room and beds for the both of you." Goten reassured her.   
  
"I don't know Goten It still doesn't feel right, I mean what if Mom, Dad or Grandma come over to visit you?" Pan questioned.   
  
"They won't, the main reason I got a separate apartment was to get away from them and I am always informed of whose going to come and who's not." Goten explained.   
  
"Starting school again was an option I didn't have before you made this offer and it's something I seriously want to do for Nikita's future.But still I don't know this is just all to sudden...." Pan said rubbing the back of her head as she paced around the room.   
  
"I'll give you time to decide, ok?" Goten said getting up and putting on his long black leather coat.   
  
"Do you have my number?" Pan asked.  
  
"Erasa gave it to me earlier." Goten said heading to the door.   
  
"Can I get you something to drink before you leave?"   
  
"No I'm fine thank you." Goten said stepping through the door.  
  
"Goten.... this isn't a yes or a no but a thank you for caring." Pan said Goten kissing on the cheek.   
  
"It was good seeing you again and finally seeing Nikita Pan.Even if are early encounter was anything but friendly." Goten said returning the kiss.   
  
"It was good seeing you as well." Pan said closing the door as Goten walk away from the door to the elevator.   
  
"Oh wait Pan I forgot here this is for you." Goten said handing Pan some money.   
  
"Goten I--" Pan began.   
  
"Take it, if not for your sake then for Nikita's, I hear she has a birthday around the corner." Goten said.   
  
"Yeah the 27th......what ever I decide to do Goten ,for what its worth............. thank you." Pan said as Goten entered the elevator.  
  
End of Chapter Two: Will Pan take Goten up on his offer? and how will Erasa react to the news.   
  
Chapter Three: I decide to leave the prequel for chapter 4.   
  
In this chapter Pan makes her choice after talking it over with Erasa and Nikita.Goten fills Pan in on what's been happening while she's been gone and Goten brings up the touchy issue of Trunks current relationship. 


	3. Black and White Confessions

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the following Dragonballz character's written in the fan fiction, nor the production of any Dragonball z merchandise. 

Title: "A Family that once was is no more" Chapter Three: Black and White confessions.

Part Three: Pan's Narrative

I stood by my dresser that night folding away some of Nikita's clothes. I was so completely caught up in my feelings I couldn't really feel the fever or how sick I really was.

At times it was difficult for me to stare into his eyes, after all that I've done, after all that he's done. I was so angry...but then so guilty, so hurt...but so in need of his pity, so weak I was ashamed of myself.

I now start to fully realize how we drifted apart. I was putting too much of my faith in one man, and even more of my problems. He had his own life, his own fears , his own problems and I was soon becoming one of them.

Now I wonder if I've been making the same mistake with Erasa. Because behind that gentle relaxed expression lives quiet suffering. Pain that overshadows mine...

Authors Narrative

She was born Sakura Erasa Cruz at 12:02 am one early Sunday morning.

She was a beautiful little blonde girl with brilliant black eyes. Eyes that seemed to beg for someone to call her their own. Sadly no one ever did...

The majority of her life was spent with her being passed from foster home to foster home.Erasa often wondered if something was wrong with her. She would be moved so much in such a short amount of time she would never really get the chance to finish unpacking her clothes.

At times she found herself sleeping in an office inside the foster agency. There were few families available and even fewer that considered to carry the emotional baggage such a young girl brought with her.

At Twelve Erasa was on the verge of being placed in a group home, something she had heard horrible things about from other foster children. Deciding it was time to live on her own comfort Erasa wandered away from that vicious emotional cycle and onto the streets.

They never really went looking for her, in their eyes it was just one less child they had to worry about.

For the first couple months Erasa slept on a mattress in the back room of a hardware store, after convincing the wife of the owner to give her a job cleaning and putting tools and supplies away, she didn't make much, just enough to eat a little something three times a day.

At times the owner's wife would buy Erasa clothes and other things she needed,Erasa seemed to grow fond of the woman but she never really became attached to Erasa. Something Erasa had been through enough of not to even care.

For the first time in her life Erasa felt as if some sort of normal existence was begining to come together for her. But as we all learn through life nothing is certain and at times life pushes us to move on.

Months later the couple sold the store and Erasa found herself homeless. That night tired and hungry she wandered into a nearby shelter, not the most pleasant looking of places but for now she knew she would have to call it home.

As she sat on the small worn bed huddled next to her belongings, she cried softly so no one would hear.

In her life she never craved expensive toys, a big house and fancy clothes. All she ever dreamed for was to be with someone who genuinely loved her, someone to tuck her in at night, someone to read to her, kiss her, hug her and most importantly say something no one has ever said to her..."Your mine and I love you."

As Erasa grew the thought of ever having a mother or a father became so distant to her. It was like trying to reach for the stars you would see on a clear night. They were there but so far from your reach you would eventually give up trying altogether.

The first time she told Pan all about this Pan felt almost guilty, here she was suffering because her family abandoned her and Erasa had never really had any type of family at all. Only people who had taken her into their care just so they could receive a check every month from Social Services. Money which Erasa told her, she had never really seen any of.

She considered Pan to be her only family the only person she trusted in life. The one who she cried too, confessed too, but never lied too, and in someways the mother ,the sister, the friend that she never had.

A person she loves and a person she know's that loves her back...

Goten's apartment West Satan City

Goten sat against the headboard of his bed staring across the room at a photo that hung on the wall.

"I still remember when that was taken..." He thought to himself laughing a bit.

The photo was of Pan smearing some of her birthday cake across Goten's face over something he had done earlier to her. You could see Chi Chi trying to stop her and Goku on the opposite end trying to snag himself a piece of cake during the confusion.

"So many memories, good memories..." He thought as his expression leveled out from content to displeased.

Goten dropped down flat on his bed and closed his eyes wanting to drift off to sleep but as soon as he did the phone rang.

Picking up the cordless he stared at the caller I.D. before answering it.

He sighed, it was not someone he really wanted to talk to right now, but he felt it was better to address the call then to have the phone ringing later on in the night.

"It's late Gohan..." Goten said answering the phone with that question.

"Late for who?" Gohan questioned.

"Me, I need to be at work early tomorrow.." Goten explained.

"Listen Goten the reason I called was because you haven't been over in awhile, not to my house not to Bulma's. I just wanted to make sure everything was alright." Goten explained with a note of concearn in his voice.

"Everythings the way it should be." Goten said in a unconvincing tone.

There was an awkward pause in the conversation.

"Listen...if this is about what was said about Paris I'm sorry, her name came up and a conversation started. I'm sorry I wish we could take it back ." Gohan apologized.

"Gohan what happened between me and Paris stays between me and Paris, it's not something I would like to be discussed openly, understood?" Goten expressed.

"I know Goten I'm sorry. listen, Thursday night around six were planning to have dinner at Bulma's. Everyone would really like it if you'd come." Gohan urged.

Goten was silent for a moment then spoke.

"Expect me a little late..." He said hanging up immediately after.

Earlier that night

West Satan city Memorial Hospital

"Sir, visiting hours are from 1:00 pm to 8:00 pm. I hope your aware the current time is 7:53pm." The Nurse alerted Goten.

" I'm a friend of the family to the patient in room 536. Her mother wanted to check on her tonight since she can't make it, she told me if I showed this card I could stay with her after normal hours." Goten said handing it to the nurse.

"Oh , your Son Goten aren't you? I remember now her mother did call earlier, I just need you to show me your drivers license and you can go up." The nurse explained.

"Here you go." Goten said handing it to her.

"Thank you, if you require anything you can always go down to the nearest Nurses station or push the call button in her room." The nurse stated to him handing back the drivers license.

"Thank you...have a nice night." Goten said making his way towards the elevators.

Stopping at the fifth floor he made his way towards room 536 once there he removed his coat folding it neatly over his arm.

Goten quietly entered the room.

He found her sleeping comfortably covered by warm quilts. The lights had been dimmed.

Gently he sat down next to her and gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.

She slowly opened her eyes and upon seeing him smiled a relieved smile.

"Hi.." She answered weakly.

"Hey beautiful...how you feeling?" Goten said stroking her hair gently.

"Tired..." She responded softly.

"Physical therapy session?" Goten asked.

"They butchered me..." She said smiling a bit.

"Did they say anything?" Goten asked.

"I've gotten better, but not nearly enough to leave this hospital." She explained with a reasonable sound of discontent in her voice.

Goten looked at her with such concearn.

" I get enough of that look from everybody else, I don't need it from the one person I can talk too. " Bura explained.

"Bura, I know after what's happened you can't be the same person anymore, but shutting people out and wrapping yourself in silence is only going to keep you here longer." Goten explained.

"I lay here day in and day out for the past four month's stuffing pain killers in my mouth to keep from feeling like my legs are burning Most of the day I'm totally alone, I have nothing but my thoughts to keep me company and they wonder why I'm less social?." She argued.

"Bura I need you to let us know what we have to do, none of us want you to be this way." Goten urged.

Bura turned her head away.

"I need too know what you want, if it something me or you mom can get you or do for you just name it." Goten said gently gliding the back of his hand against the side of her face.

"There's a lot of things most of which can only be dreams..." Bura answered.

"It doesn't hurt to let someone else in..." Goten explained..

"I loved her so much, after what I did I really didn't think it was right for me to love someone like that again." she started.

Goten listened.

"She came to me for help and all I could see was the mistakes she made." She admitted.

"Bura..." Goten said a bit weary.

"I know Goten no one's heard from her , but it's a dream I tend to have every now and then. Being able to look her in the eye and say forgive me." Bura expressed getting a bit defensive.

Goten covered his eyes and leaned his head on his arm not sure how to help Bura.

"I've done a lot in my life wrong even since then, things I did that complicated peoples lives." Bura explained.

Goten just listened.

"Do you think about her Goten?" Bura questioned.

"Sometimes..." He stated.

"She really had a lot of faith to do what she did you know?, she didn't come back crawling on her knees like Gohan said she would." Bura pointed out.

"We've missed out on so much, the birth, the kids first words, first steps , Pan turning 18 and then 20, I seriously would of loved to had been there for that." Bura expressed.

Bura eyes began to drift.

"Just relax, I no how you feel.." Goten said taking her hand gently.

"I always feel better when your around me." She smiled as her eyes began to close.

"I told you already, I'm here for whenever you need me I always have been." Goten stated.

"Stay with me... just until I'm out cold." Bura requested squeezing Goten's hand a bit as her eyes closed.

"Sure..." Goten said squeezing back gently.

Three days Later

East Satan City Harbor

Pan entered the office area somewhat nervously. She had always been up there to pick up her pay never to speak with her employer on a personal level.

"You wanted to see me Mr. Monroe?" Pan spoke to a man sitting at desk a few feet in front of her.

"Have a seat." he advised.

Pan had not been feeling well for the past three days since the incident at the park , errors and misjudgements in her work were noticeable.

"Pan I called you In here to talk to you about a few concerns I have involving your work recently." He bagan.

"Mr. Monroe' let me first say I haven't been feeling well and-- I know I've haven't met quota recently but-- I promise if I have too work another shift to make it up I--." Pan spoke in a apologetic panicky way.

"Pan please calm yourself, it's not what you think ok? settle down." He assured her.

Pan took a breath and relaxed herself.

"Pan I called you in because a few of your co workers have brought their concerns about your well being to my attention. I know it's none of my business and it's not my place but first let me assure you whatever we speak in this office is confidential no one else will know." He assured her.

"I know sir." Pan said seeming somewhat worried about what he was going to ask her.

"Pan is there any serious medical complications going on with you? I ask you this because honestly for a awhile now I've seen you sort of depressed, somewhat unfocused sometimes the energy you always show in your work dwindles and people around you are taking notice that your giving off the impression that something is wrong and I know part of this maybe do to the fact that you're a single mother and you have to take a lot of time to attend to your daughter." He Explained.

"I have certain things going on in my life right now, but nothing I'm bringing to work with me." Pan said staring down towards the floor.

"When was the last time you saw a doctor?" He asked removing his glasses.

"Honestly? it's been awhile." Pan admitted.

He stared at her for a moment watching her nervously avoid eye contact.

"Pan... I tell you what. I want you to take the rest of the day off...and the next two days. And during that time I want you to have your self checked out ok?"

"Sir I can't I can't afford to not have the pay from those days under my belt." Pan admitted.

He smiled. "Pan...I remember when you first walked into my office carrying that little girl of yours looking for some sort of work. I took a real risk hiring an 18 year old girl with no experience what so ever. And I'll admit because you were a young mother that did play on my heart strings a bit. But you know what? I'm not sorry I hired you, hell you work harder then most of the men in this harbor.

That's why I want to see you get better. And don't worry I know that's why your going recieve pay for those days." He expressed.

"I don't know what to say...I've always thought I was just getting by in my work." Pan said somewhat stunned.

"Right now Pan go home and get some sleep." He advised.

"I--um I don't how too thank you for this..." Pan admitted.

"There's no need, I'll see you Monday ok?." He explained as Pan rose from her seat.

"Thank you...for everything." Pan said before leaving his office.

"Nikita's going to be so happy, this way I can spend the rest of the day with her and I can take her to my appointment and then end the rest of the week at home." Pan thought to herself walking along the shoveled sidewalks.

The bus pulled to the stop at the end of the street.

"It's a blessing." Pan said walking towards the bus stop.

The bus was virtually empty except for one man sitting in the very back.

Pan sat in the middle and leaned her head back against the seat staring through the window as the bus pulled out of the stop.

As the bus rolled through the streets of East Satan city Pan could feel the eyes of the man sitting in back settling upon her. She decided to shake off the notion and closed her eyes to rest a bit.

She began to hear foot steps draw close to where she was sitting she began to worry. But it's when the man stood next to the empty beside her she really started to worry.

She turned her head slowly in his direction. Her eyes widened she couldn't believe who it was next to her.

"...Vegeta." Pan said staring at him.

"I'm surprised you still remember. It's been awhile." He replied.

There was a pause in the conversation neither knew how to continue.

"Can I sit?." Vegeta asked.

"Y-Yeah sure." Pan said moving her bag from the empty seat.

"Forgive me I'm not very good at this sort of thing." Vegeta admitted.

"It's alright, I'm not any better." She admitted.

"So, are you doing ok?" Vegeta questioned.

"It's been-- I'm holding my own." Pan expressed.

Vegeta just nodded a bit.

Vegeta stared at Pan trying to read her current situation.

"It's none of my buisness and you don't really have to answer this, but I wanted to know--"

"It was a girl--Nikita--she's doing good." Pan said realizing what he was going to ask.

"You don't happen to have a picture of her on you do you?" Vegeta asked.

"Yeah give me a sec." Pan said opening her purse and pulling out a small wallet size photo of Nikita then handing it to Vegeta.

"She takes after you in the eyes..." Vegeta said smiling a bit handing the photo back to Pan.

"You could keep it if you'd like but--." Pan explained.

"Don't worry it'll stay with me only." Vegeta said assuring Pan placing the photo in the inner pocket of his brown leather jacket near his chest.

The bus pulled into a stop.

"This is me..." Vegeta said getting up.

"Vegeta..." Pan called softly.

Vegeta looked back.

"It was good to see you." Pan expressed.

Vegeta gave a quick half smile then headed towards the exit.

Suddenly he stopped and without turning he spoke.

"I just wanted you to know...It wouldn't of been so bad having you as part of my family. Please forgive me and my son." and with that he stepped off the bus.

Words that left Pan not knowing what to think.

"He couldn't of mean't that." Pan thought as the bus pulled out of the stop.

-Pan's Apartment-

"It would be best if you did see a doctor on your time off after what happened Saturday I'm scared to leave you alone." Erasa Expressed.

"I know, I'm sorry look I'll make an appointment for Thursday they'll run a few tests and then I know from there. Seriously I think it's just all the stress I've been under I just need to unwind." Pan explained.

"I hope it's just that..." Erasa stated.

There was a knock at the door.

Pan looked at Erasa to see if she was expecting anyone Erasa simply shrug her shoulders. Pan walked over to the door and gently opened it peering through the corner.

"Hey..." Pan said seeing who it was.

"Hey...I hope I'm not bothering you."

"No, no...I just got home...come in." Pan said stepping aside.

"Pan who's at the--" Erasa started but stop as she saw who it was.

"Hey Goten ?" Erasa said as Goten kissed her on the cheek.

"Not much...So how's everything with you two?" Goten asked.

"No problems here." Erasa expressed.

"Um...so far so good I actually got a little time off from work this week." Pan explained.

" Let me get your coat it's warm in here." Erasa said slipping off Goten coat.

"Thanks..."

Erasa headed towards the closet but before that wisphered in Pan ear.

"Do you see the body on this guy...yum" Erasa said laughing abit as Pan smiled and pushed her away playfully.

"That's my uncle jeez." Pan whispered back.

Goten sort of blushed realizing they were probably talking about him.

"So Goten come lets sit on the couch." Pan said walking over there.

Pan stared at Goten as he sat next to her.

"You know theres always something about like I can see it in your face... you came here to ask me something right?" Pan asked.

Erasa sat on the arm rest of the couch next to Pan.

"...actually yeah I was wondering if you guys wanted to maybe have dinner with me at my place tonight." Goten asked cautiously.

"Oh wow...uh I don't know...um Erasa?" Pan asked unsure.

"I don't see why not." Erasa expressed.

"Well ok then sure." Pan said.

"Great uh just to warn you it is take out." Goten said a bit weary.

"Oh un I see." Pan said not being a fan of take out herself.

"Not that I'd mind take out, but if you really want to die happy me and Erasa could come up with something pretty edible right?." Pan turned to Erasa.

"I couldn't ask you to do that Pan the whole point was to treat you guys to something nice." Goten admitted.

"It would pretty nice to me to have that home cooked family dinner feeling back.

"Ok so how does this sound, how about you let me cook for everyone today." Pan said content.

"Really I would like to I mean you know in a way it'll kinda be like having a family dinner like... you know we use too." Pan explained.

"All right if it'll make you feel that way then sure." Goten said.

"MOMMY! my red crayon broke when I was coloring--GOTEN!" Nikita said jumping on Goten's lap.

"Hey how's my favorite lavender haired princess?" Goten said kissing Nikita on the cheek making her giggle.

"Good...I was drawing a picture of my friend and of you and Mommy and Erasa too." she explained excitedly.

"Can I see?"

"It's not finished ,I'll show you when I'm done." Nikita said swinging her feet as she sat on Goten lap.

"She's so adorable Pan , think soon she'll be as tall as you in about a week." Goten joked.

"What a cheap shot..." Pan said smiling.

"Hey Nikita you know your going to my house today?"

"Really!" Nikita asked excitedly.

"Yeah speaking of which before we do you need a bath." Pan said getting up.

"I got to get dressed too." Erasa said heading to her room.

"You don't mind waiting for a little while do you Goten?" Pan said.

"No not at all do what you got to do." Goten said

"Lets go Niki." Pan said signaling to her daughter.

"Don't go Goten I'll be back ok?" Nikita explained.

"I won't sweety, promise."

An hour later

"Nikita come here so Mommy can put your shoes on." Pan said entering the living room carrying a small pair of shoes and walking over to Nikita who sat on the couch next to Goten.

As Pan kneeled down to buckle her daughter shoes Goten sat there in awe staring at her.She was dressed in a red blouse tucked into her long black pants her nails painted ruby red as her lips and her long shiny black hair let loose down her shoulders to slightly covered her beautiful gold earrings the last present her mother ever gave.

She certainly didn't look like Pan , she looked so much older and so much more serious.

"Is everything okay..." Pan asked Goten as she noticed he was staring at her.

"Yeah...sorry it just that...I almost didn't recognize you." he admitted.

Pan blushed. "It's just make up...it's not really me." She said getting up walking towards her room.

"Did I say something wrong?" Goten asked himself out loud.

"Erasa told me Mommy's gets very self- self." Nikita said trying to remember the word

"Self- conscious?" .

"Uh huh sometimes about how pretty she looks." Nikita explained.

"It was easy to understand , Pan had been degraded into beliving so many things about herself her confidence was shot along with her pride she can't even look me in the face sometimes maybe because when I stare at her she thinks I'm juding her in every way." Goten thought.

An hour later

Goten apartment west Satan City

Goten turned the keys and opened the door and hit the light switch beside it as he entered.

Pan instantly was left in disbelief as she gazed around.

"Goten...this is a really, really nice apartment."

"That's an understatement for sure." Erasa expressed.

"How did you-just what do you do for a living." Pan asked stunned.

"Umm...I work in marketing...for a huge wirless phone service company" He explained.

"I should of known you and your cell phones go together like peaches and cream." Pan expressed.

" Oh cool you got a Fire place too." Erasa said.

"Yeah I'll lite it up as soon as the temperature drops this evening." Goten informed her.

"I guess I should get started." Pan said taking off her coat.

"Do you want me to help out Pan." Erasa offered.

"Sit spend some time with Goten I can handle things." Pan assured her walking into the kitchen.

"Hey Nikita do you want to watch a movie with me?" Goten asked.

"Yeah..." Nikita said sitting on the couch.

"What kind of movies do you like?"

"I like the ones with a lot of fighting and blood and--"

"Nikita Maria Son!" Pan called from the kitchen."

"Disney would be cool I guess." Nikita said taking that warning seriously from her mother.

Goten laughed a bit.

"She means well..." Goten explained to Nikita.

Erasa sat down next to Nikita.

"She says that now but if you did let her watch that movie she'll have me up all night crying saying that she doesn't want to go back to sleep and I'll end up having to sit with her until she tires herself out." Erasa explained.

Nikita just stuck her tongue out at Erasa.

Erasa returned the gesture.

Pan walked back to the living room.

"Ok how about this don't start drooling just yet, a Steak dinner with all the trimmings, white rice, chicken Cesar salad and for desert apple pie." Pan described.

"You serious?" Goten said mentally drooling.

"Yeah...sounds good huh? oh and Erasa I kinda do think I need your help."

"Sure no problem Pan." Erasa said getting up.

A few minutes Later

"So how you two doing?" Goten asked wandering into the kicthen.

"It's coming together." Erasa said.

"Goten pass me the garlic." Pan said preparing the steak.

"Here so Pan where did you learn how too cook?" Goten asked handing her garlic.

"Erasa taught me, and I started trying some things on my own and I kinda evolved into a better cook than Erasa." Pan explained.

"She starting with me, you heard her." Erasa pointed out.

"I'm just stating what is fact ." Pan teased

"¿Cómo puede usted decir eso? Cuando primero satisfice usted no podría hacerse los huevos revueltos sin algo que cogía en el fuego y otra cosa--"

"Here she goes..."

"Thats a surprize I didn't know you where latin Erasa?" Goten expressed.

"Yeah I was told that--I mean my mother was from puerto rico and my father was born here thats how I learned it from my mom." Erasa said laughing abit nervously.

"Oh what about your parents do they live in Satan city too?" Goten inquired.

"Oh no they--they moved to the states awhile back." She lied.

"Oh I bet you miss them huh?" Goten questioned.

"Yeah I uh--I do... can you use excuse me I have to use the bathroom Erasa said quickly walking off hiding a falling tear from her right eye.

"Did I say something wrong?" Goten asked Pan alittle bit confused.

"No...Goten promise me you won't tell her I said anything to you she would feel so embrassed." Pan explained.

"Yeah sure what is it?."

"You see Erasa really trying to paint a very pretty false picture over something devastating you see erasa's parents aren't really in the states not that I know of anyway she never had any parents."

"What do you mean."

"She was abandoned at the hospital as a new born, she was in and out of foster care nearly for the first 12 years of her life. She's been in homeless shelters she to beg at times for food in short excuse my language, life really fucked her over and she very sensitive about her past it's not your fault you didn't know but it would be best if the subject of her parents never comes up again.

"I had no idea, why would she lie..." Goten thought.

"Obviously she thought you think she was some kind of street rat or something." Pan explained.

"Aw man now I feel awful."

"Don't worry, look I'll be back let me check on her." Pan said heading towards the bathroom.

"Erasa it's Pan open up..."

The door unlocked.

"Hey...you ok?" Pan said as she saw Erasa leaning over the sink.

Pan walked over and rubbed her back alittle.

Erasa stood there quietly.

"I know sweety it hurts but listen he won't mention it anymore I told him that you really miss your parents and want to be with them and you get emotional when ever you think about them don't worry he understands ok?" Pan explained.

"Come on lets finish up the dinner ok?" Pan said taking her hand guiding her out of the bathroom.

Sometime later

"Ok every body, dinners ready. Nikita wait for Mommy to cut it for you." Pan advised.

"Pan this is really something I swear Mom would be jealous." Goten said enjoying himself.

"Oh stop..." Pan said flattered.

"You know what would go great with this?" Goten asked getting up and opening a small cabinet in the wall unit next to the T.V.

He held up a bottle of red wine.

"Just alittle for me thanks." Pan explained taking her seat.

"Same here it won't be pretty if I have too much." Erasa confessed.

"I want some!" Nikita annonced.

"Sorry sweety but your not old enough , but you can have the next best thing Pepsi." Pan said filling her daughters glass with it.

"That sucks." Nikita said making everbody laugh.

An hour Later

Pan sat with Goten at the dinner table Erasa and Nikita sat in Goten's room playing video games.

"You know Goten I was wondering why did you get such a big apartment if it's just you." Pan questioned.

Goten slowly put his drink down.

"That was during the time me and paris were together, we were going to start a family." Goten admitted.

"Can I ask why did you guys split up?" Pan wondered.

"It's a long and painful story I'll tell you some other time..." Goten explained.

"Goten...um--how's your mom doing?" Pan questioned.

"She's good...you know--she misses you...a lot." Goten said with a little bit of caution.

"And--my parents? you know--how are they doing?" Pan asked nervously.

"Good, good, you know there waiting for you always."

"Uh-"

"Everyone's fine well except--" Goten paused not knowing if he should say anything.

"Why do I get the feeling someone's not alright?" Pan expressed.

"Bura...she's in the hospital..."

"What, what happened?"

"Do you remeber that train that derailed four months ago?" Goten questioned.

"The express that takes you from one end of Satan city to the other?" Pan asked.

"Yeah...she was on it." Goten said

"Oh god, what kind of shape is she in?" Pan asked.

"The area of the train she was in was a corner that part of the train collasped inside her legs were nearly fully crushed under the metal.But she got away with no broken bone but there was so much bruising and muscle damage the bruising gone but and if you saw her wouldn't think she had even been in such an accident but the damage to her leg muscles and the pain that comes with it has left her learning how to walk all over again." Goten explained.

"Oh god, but she'll walk again right?" Pan asked with almost tears in her eyes.

"'Thats wishful thinking' one of the doctors told me." goten explained.

"Hows Bulma taking it? and vegeta." Pan asked concearned.

"Pretty well they've learned to except that possibilty."

"And Trunks-- hows he doing?" She questioned.

"Alright...you know."

"And the girl he's with?" Pan asked.

"How did you know he was with anyone?" Goten asked

"It didn't you just told me." Pan said slightly fooling Goten into telling her.

"He'll probably use her then when he's done throw away or totally forget about her he'll never find love I think." she said taking another shot of her drink.

"Pan...Trunks is married."

Pan's face just fell.

"Married?" Pan said almost in shock.

"Her name is cherry...they got married about three years ago."

Pan looked away trying to contemplate what she just heard.

"I know that's something hard to swallow but--" Goten began before he was cut off

"Goten?... what type of person is Cherry? I want your real feelings on her don't water it down for me please." Pan requested. Staring towards the floor speaking in a softer voice.

"Pan--" goten said in protest.

"Please...it's alright just tell me."

"She's very close to everyone especially your mom...everybody seems to just love her she's one of those people who can really make you feel better. Someone very giving and

considerate ,who always willing to lend a hand. She can even put a smile on Vegeta's face

sometimes she's a good person Pan I have nothing bad to say about her." Goten explained.

"G-Goten? does she know about me?" Pan asked as her body began to tremble alittle.

"She doesn't even know Videl has a daughter." Goten said almost regretfully.

Tears began to rolled down Pan's face.

"Everyone felt it was better if cherry didn't know , no-one wanted to put anything between their relationship." Goten

"That's really good Goten...I'm happy they found someone who-- someone who--" Pan stopped collapsing to her knees as she began to cry hysterically.

Goten rushed over too her kneeling beside her.

"Look at me Pan please... you don't have to feel that way." Goten said rubbing her back gently.

Erasa stood against a wall a few feet away listening.

"It really is better this way Goten...I don't need to bring my problems back into their lives...you know I lied to you before...about not wanting to go back home...that's all I've ever thought about but now I see there's no point there really is no place for me there anymore." Pan said as Goten pulled her close to him embracing her.

"Every single person over there has you their hearts , they just had to adjust to you not being there Pan but that doesn't mean you don't have a place in that family. I grantee you if you were to go back with Nikita you would get nothing but love, but you have to make it happen I can't force you." Goten explained.

"I don't think I'd even have the courage to stare anybody in the face..."

"You did to me..." Goten pointed out.

"You said it yourself, Trunks is happy with his life and everyone loves cherry now why do I want to change that?" Pan said weary of the idea.

"Because it's your right, that's your family too, Trunks family is your family because of Nikita and because Nikita deserves to know who her family is but most importantly who her father is." Goten expressed.

Pan began to remember, remembering what Vegeta had said.

"...It wouldn't of been so bad to have had you as part of my family." A thought at that moment that replayed itself over and over.

Pan just looked away in doubt.

"You can't continue to hide anymore , because if you do then you'll be admitting to everyone that you were wrong and Nikita should never been born and you know that's not true." Goten pointed out.

"Grandpa would want us to be together..." Pan thought.

"If I say yes--"

"We'll take it slow I promise." He said wiping some of the tears from Pan's face.

"Would you consider living here with me liked about what we talked about before?" Goten asked.

"I--where is--" Pan said looking around until she saw Erasa.

"Erasa come here." Pan said. Erasa slowly walked over to where Pan was kneeling and kneeled beside her.

"Erasa I want to do this, but I want you with on this ok?" Pan explained.

"Pan I can't I--" Erasa said unsure.

"Please I don't want to leave you alone , not after how much you've suffered."

"Pan don't." Erasa said realizing what Pan was referring too.

Goten slowly took Erasa's hand. Erasa looked up at him curiously.

"I know your worried that I would of thought differently about you because of how you grew up, that doesn't matter to me Erasa I like you for the person you are I like being around you and I would really like for you and Pan to be here with me." Goten said gently kissing Erasa on the lips.

Erasa began to turn red.

Pan smiled.

"I guess I could..." Erasa said still a little flushed from the kiss.

"Where's the little one so we can tell her." Goten said looking around.

"Nikita! come here sweety! " Pan called.

Nikita walked over from the room.

"What's everybody doing on the floor?" She asked as Pan took her hand.

"Niki, would you like to live here with me, Erasa and Uncle Goten?" Pan questioned.

"Huh?...Really?..That would be cool." She said content.

"Well I guess it's settled then..." Pan said raising from the floor.

"This is all for the better Pan." Goten expressed.

Pan thought about something for a moment then shared it with Goten.

"Goten would it be alright if me and Nikita went with you the next time you visit Bura?" Pan asked suddenly.

"Uh yeah sure, you really mean it?" Goten asked.

"If I'm going to start putting back pieces of my life I might as well start with her." Pan explained.

"It's really good to hear you say that. Come on I want to show you guys your rooms." Goten taking Erasa's hand.

"Pan you coming?"

"In a minute...I just need to think a little."

"Sure come on Nikita up you go." Goten said giving Nikita a piggy back ride then heading towards the rooms followed by Erasa.

Pan walked over to the living room window through it you could the whole city shining brightly throught the snow Pan slowly put her hand agains't the glass.

"You moved on...maybe that's what I should be doing." Pan said letting her hand fall gently from the glass walking away.

Somewhere else in the city

"Trunks sweety are you ok?"

"Yeah I was just looking out at the city for a little bit." He responded.

"Something on your mind?" she asked.

"No no one, I'm sorry lets go to bed." Trunks said heading towards his room.

"Why did he say no one?" Cherry said looking out towards the city then closed the curtians.

Authors Notes

Very sorry a hundred apologies to everyone who been waiting for this chapter for so long I hope you like this chapter and the next will be out shortly it's 50 done I was working on both at the same time.

Check my profile page to get a chapter summary of upcoming chapters.


End file.
